Spin Cycle

I hate the term “spin”, as in to “put a spin on something”. In this context “spin” is another word for “lie” – which actually makes the term “spin” a spin in itself. Follow me? Good.

Spin is the assumption on the part of the spinner that if they put a sugar candy coating on an unpleasant truth that we will swallow it without question. Have you ever held a coated aspirin on your tongue long enough for the coating to dissolve? Guess what – tastes like aspirin. Uggh.

Spin is patronizing, insulting, filthy, dishonest and a gutless substitute for “balls” (pardon the unintentional sexism). Personally speaking the wages of spin is that I barely take anything I read at face value anymore.

This tirade stems from the most recent suggestion, by those who supply water to the Greater Toronto Area, that the pricing of water should be based on the same template as the pricing of electricity i.e. the price for water should be set daily, even hourly, as the demand for water fluctuates. If it’s a hot day and folks are using a lot of water, the price goes up. If it’s a cool day and the demand isn’t as high, the price goes down – just like electricity.

Here’s the spin – “this will make people more conscious of their water usage and therefore they’ll learn to conserve water”.

BULLSHIT

No supplier of ANYTHING has EVER given a shit about conserving ANYTHING, save for profits. I cannot in my sickest imagination see the suppliers of water patting themselves on the back for SELLING LESS WATER.

Here’s problem #2 with this spin – water is not and should never be seen as a commodity. Unfortunately we’re increasingly seeing the commercialization of water. We have slowly but surely grown accustomed to water as a product through the sale of bottled water, the “spin” being that tap water is unsafe. Really? That’s pretty fucked up, I brush my teeth with it every single day, I wash my hands in it several times a day, I bath in it, I give it to my cats, sometimes I even (???) DRINK IT. I’ve engaged in this relationship with tap water since 1959, and my only problem is that I piss a lot when I’ve had too much. Soooo the water that’s coming from today’s municipal purification systems, which I’ll assume are more “state of the art” than the ones from 1959, is not as good as the water I drank all through my childhood (pre-bottled water)? Wow – f*** me.

Water is the essence of all living things. We NEED water in order to stay alive. No water, no life. No water, no planet. To base the pricing of water on “market value” is as ludicrous as charging for air. That said we, all of us, bear the responsibility of conserving water – but this should not be mandated via price fixing, it should be mandated by common sense, which I’m still optimistic most people have.

Stop using automated lawn irrigation systems, don’t flush your toilet until it’s necessary, etc etc etc – water conservation tips are just a Google away.

You really want to f*** with the spinners? Stop buying bottled water, reduce demand all on your own, buy a Brita water jug, or a tap filter.

Refuse to let water become the new oil or electricity.

Don’t accept lies from profiteers.