Cats

I love cats. Cats are reasonably independent. Some people find this off-putting. Personally I like an animal that knows it needs me, but is too cool to show it. Cats are very clean, in fact they’re self-cleaning. Cats will shit in a box AND cover it up. Cats, although they speak only one language, have any number of dialects. They’re personalities differ from cat to cat, and some are just plain nuts. Cats have a social order. Cats can fall asleep in the midst of a horrible racket. Cats are endearingly curious. Some cats purr, some don’t, some run around until they crash, some just stare at you and occasionally blink.

This is not to say I don’t love all animals, I’m just partial to cats.

Except for the longhaired ones that they hire to sell toilet paper, those I’d just as soon wipe my ass with.